Table Manners and Tec Explosions
Here is a matter dear to my heart. I grew up with strict table manners. I can say that they were truly strict and well enforced. Looking back at these "Enforced Rules", I can tell you I am thankful for most of them. These are not what I am talking about today. That is for another post, some other time.
What has been on my mind is how this generation of Tec Children, for lack of a better word, entertain themselves with their handheld computer devices. A particularly profound pattern has been observed while children/young adults/adults/and parents have been in a restaurant or eating establishment. The problem arises immediately even before sitting down.
What am I talking about? Why don't I just go with the "flow"? Why is it my business, anyway? If any of these is your response, you truly need to keep reading this blog post.
Let's tackle these questions one at a time.
First, "What am I talking about"?
I'll give a few examples:
- I seem to see an increase of people engrossed on their phones and not on the people around them during meal time.
- I have witnessed total absorption of children in their handheld devices/phones and not their parents or their food.
- I have been privy to a parental conversation to a child who had total disrespect for the parent and those around her.
- It is plain and simple. It's terribly rude and inconsiderate.
- It becomes a distraction to the entire table of people. And sometimes the whole restaurant.
- The inconceivable language and rudeness become sadly commonplace and accepted.
I'll give a few examples:
- I am a customer just as you are. I came for a quiet, relaxed, and enjoyable meal.
- I ignore the first, the second, and sometimes, the third occurrence of the child's inappropriate behavior when corrected over and over again to put away the device, to no avail.
- It is disturbing to see a table full of grown people absorbed so fully in their devices that they ignore the waitstaff. This not only is rude but wastes their time and other customers time as well.
I will explain further with an appropriate scenario.
It is Thanksgiving Dinner and the company have arrived. The table is set in all the Holiday Finery. The food is hot and looking rather delicious. Everyone takes their respective seats and the parent calls the children to come to the table.
The children, well some of them anyway, come scurrying to the table, device in hand. The parents immediately see where the children's attention is drawn and verbally pull them out of their trance to greet the guests. A flippant "Hi" is produced and the attention is lost, once again, to the glowing screen in their hand.
The other children who are still "playing" the video game in the other room, have yet to arrive at the table. The parents call, no answer, again they call, and get, "Just a minute"! Which inevitably causes friction and tempers flare. Angry words are said producing a hostile situation to start the holiday with.
After some debate, the device is turned off and the, now disgruntled children, come to the table. There is no greeting to the guests, there is no eye contact with the parents. There is an underlying sense of discomfort looming at the table.
Not to disturb the guests any longer, the host starts the dinner. If prayer is given, the handheld game players either refuse to put the devices away or lay them somewhere they can still see the action on the screen. The angry players, from the other room, aren't pleased with the scene and a fight ensues causing even more disruption.
Finally, there is peace at the table. The food is being passed around to the participants. Remember, the parents are allowing this behavior to continue and the devices are in view and are being poked at to continually perform.
Food is backing up around the device players and getting cold. The parents ask politely to "put away the phones". There is no response. Again and again, the parents plead with the children to remove the devices and pay attention to the dinner and guests.
Now everyone has a filled plate of delightful foods in front of them and conversations begin. The children are pushing the food around their plates with their fork in one hand and fidgeting with the phone or device in the other hand. Children's heads are turned downward. There is no response or acknowledgment to the people talking to them. It becomes apparent this behavior is going to be a big problem. The parents are becoming angry, the guests are becoming uneasy, and the kids don't care.
After a few moments, the handheld games are removed from the children resulting in instant disapproval in the form of screaming, shouting, snatching, and bad language.
Are you getting the picture? Let me continue.
Upheaval at the table has now replaced calm and relaxation. Parents are snatching up children and walking them out of the room. There is yelling, screaming, some kicking, and thrashing. It isn't a pretty sight. And the scene does not end nicely.
Many of the patient company leave some stick around and pick at their plates. The conversations are strained, to say the least. It has been ruined. This beautiful dinner, the hard work that was done by those who prepare the dinner has gone out the window with the trash. No one is happy. No one has had a memorable evening of fun family times.
After writing this piece, I researched to find out more. Is this just me or is this a real problem that has come from our perceived need for this technology? Could this be the reason for many of our children being diagnosed as A.D.H.D. (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder)? Have you ever given it thought? Maybe we all should.
My research shows a strong correlation between phones/tablets/games and bad/defiant/appalling behavior.
One article states some alarming statistics.
"A new survey by Pew Research Center found that 88% of respondents believe it’s “generally” not OK to use a cell phone during dinner." reported by Victor Luckerson of Time Magazine.
In an article by By Deni Kirkova for MailOnline for the Daily Mail, UK, "Almost half of mothers have resorted to forcibly removing technology from dinner by either banning or hiding it."
and that
"11.4 million tech devices brought to UK dinner tables and disrupt meals.
More than a third of kids spend family dinner times distracted by technology.
They are especially prone to surfing social media sites such as Facebook.
One in 8 mothers admit to texting their kids to get them to the dinner table."
Sadly, this behavior has caused many restaurants to ban the use of ALL cellphones by their diners. "With diners increasingly texting or snapping photos while they're eating out, some restaurants owners are resorting to banning the habit. In their view, meals are for real-life social connections, not social media."
and that
"Recent research shows how addicting mobile technology can be: Nearly 50 percent of parents and more than 70 percent of teens say they feel the need to respond to texts and other notifications immediately." according to an article from CBSNews.com.
In closing, I hope you can now see, with some statistics, that this is a problem that must be addressed.
There are more articles out there that I did not mention. Please do some research if you want to know more. Let me know what you find in the comments below. Thank you.
Enjoy!
All photos are by CJD.Sign. If you want to use my photo, please give me credit. Thank you.
Love and links are always appreciated!
If you’d like to share this post, please link to this post directly for the DIY tutorial and do not include the instructions in your own post. All photos on this post are by CJD.Sign. Please give credit. Thanks so much! oxo CJ
It's The Holiday Season and if you want that special gemstone for that special someone, you might want to order it now!
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| http://CustomGemCutter.com |
All photos are by CJD.Sign. If you want to use my photo, please give me credit. Thank you.
Love and links are always appreciated!
If you’d like to share this post, please link to this post directly for the DIY tutorial and do not include the instructions in your own post. All photos on this post are by CJD.Sign. Please give credit. Thanks so much! oxo CJ
It's The Holiday Season and if you want that special gemstone for that special someone, you might want to order it now!
|
| http://CustomGemCutter.com |
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